Understanding Human Psychology

  Coaching is not about giving solutions; it’s about entering the client’s world and seeing it through their eyes. One of the simplest, most beautiful ways to do this is through metaphors. In a recent coaching session, I was using the Wheel of Life tool and asked the coachee, “Which area of your life, if improved, would create a ripple effect on all the others?” He paused, thought for a moment, and then said, “If I get this one area sorted, it’s like a key piece of my Tetris. When that piece falls into place, everything else starts aligning.” That Tetris metaphor wasn’t just a casual line—it was a doorway. For the rest of the session, I used his metaphor: “So what’s blocking that piece?” “What would it feel like when it fits?” “What’s your next move in this game?” The energy shifted. He was more engaged, more reflective, and felt seen. That’s the power of using their language, their imagery. Metaphors aren’t decorative—they’re deeply personal. When a client shares one, it’s an in...

  Back in 2019, during my maternity break, I decided to join my team for an office retreat. My daughter was just five months old, and though motherhood had filled me with love, staying indoors day after day had begun to feel stifling. I missed the buzz of work, the energy of my team, and the small talk over chai. So, when the chance to attend the retreat came up, I took it. On the first day, our business leader asked each of us to pick an object around us—something that symbolically represented who we were at that moment. The responses were beautiful. One colleague said they were like a tree, grounded and nurturing. Another felt like the weather—sometimes sunny, sometimes stormy. Someone said they were a pen, full of ideas. Another felt like a blank page, open to new beginnings. When it was my turn, I chose something unexpected. I had been watching the little pond nearby, filled with colorful fishes trapped inside its stone walls. I said, “I feel like one of those fishes—alive, vib...

I was witnessing a group coaching session. Lots of surface-level chatter. Until the coach asked, "What are you pretending not to know?" Silence. Someone shifted. Another crossed their arms. Then one brave voice said, "That I hate my job but feel too guilty to leave." Boom. Vulnerability unlocked the room. Others followed. Stories poured out. Real talk began. That one question cracked open a safe space. It reminded me: the right question doesn’t provide an answer. It opens a door. What’s a question that changed you? I challenge you to think of a reflective question which will help change the readers' perspective. Write it in the comments. If you’re looking for powerful coaching questions, you’ll love these reads. Check them out here. This post contains affiliate links. If you buy through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you.  Go to Books for Coaching 🌟  1. "Co-Active Coaching" by Henry Kimsey-House et al. A go...

  It all began with one person asking, “What can I do to increase my visibility in the organisation and get promoted?” Then another spoke to me about the challenging team dynamics he was facing. One by one, different voices shared their concerns — shifting topics, new stories, same space. And I remained. Holding space. Listening with presence. Gently nudging them to think for themselves. This was back in 2021 — the year I first discovered coaching. Eager to deepen my understanding of human behaviour, I also began studying Neuro-Linguistic Programming. Fast forward to 2024, shortly after completing my PhD, the ever-curious learner in me whispered, “It’s time to start your ICF credentialing journey.” I felt a strong pull to not just practice coaching, but truly understand the process, the structure, and the deeper essence of it. Being a coach within my organisation gave me a rich space to apply what I was learning. I chose Erickson - Xmonks for my ACC journey — and what a choice it w...

This post contains affiliate links. If you buy through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. Lately, I’ve been reading more about multitasking — and honestly, it’s surprising how much of what we’ve been told about it is wrong. For the longest time, people said multitasking was the secret to managing time better. Do two things at once — save time! they said. But research and real-life experiences now tell a different story:   Multitasking doesn’t save time. It doesn’t reduce stress.   It actually drains you faster, increases mistakes, and leaves you mentally scattered. Think about it like this:   Imagine trying to fill three cups with water at the same time — one hand on each jug.   What happens?   You spill water, none of the cups get filled properly, and you feel rushed and clumsy.   But if you pour water into one cup fully, then move to the next, and then the next, you’ll fill all three faster — with le...

We don’t just accept assumptions in simple exercises like I had mentioned in my last post about assuming two circles are not identical when someone told us they are not, and then going the next step to pointing out which one is larger than the other. We also carry assumptions into our daily decisions, beliefs, and even lifelong perspectives. Many of the things we hold as absolute truths may simply be ideas we inherited from authority figures, cultural conditioning, or personal experiences that shaped our worldview.  As a coach, I often witness how deeply ingrained beliefs can keep people stuck. Some individuals believe they are “not leadership material” because they were once criticized early in their careers. Others assume that changing careers is “too risky” because they’ve been told stability is everything.  These beliefs are rarely questioned but have a profound impact on their choices, success, and fulfillment. If we can challenge the assumptions it would change our lives...