Understanding Human Psychology

What has this year brought to me? I asked myself today. It's a whirlwind of emotions of joy and tears, it's a plethora of events which are wins and losses, it's a bag full of memories of laughter and cries, and stories which I remember to take to the coming year. After ending the year 2023 with my PhD thesis submission, I start this year with preparation for my viva, in anticipation of the feedback from my examiners. In the meantime, I dealt with a loss, which will always remain very personal, my dear aunt Dr. Katy Gandevia who was not just my aunt, but in my mind she was equal to my mother. This year also brought many family members to rekindle lost relationships, and many who served relations without a thought. This year in May, after I received the thesis feedback from my examiners, I have defended my thesis and given viva on 16th May, and achieved the highest education and title of Dr.  During the same time I received my NLP Master Practitioner Certification, which I wo...

  Recently I was designing a workshop on problem solving, when I included the concept of design thinking as one of the topics. I understood it as one of the most effective ways to approach any business problem. I delved into it deeper for understanding and realised that it can act as a guiding tool in any situation. Design Thinking isn’t just for designers of a product or a service—it’s a way of solving problems that fits right into our daily lives. At its heart is the stage of Empathize. The first step towards this approach. This step reminds us to pause and truly understand others’ needs, feelings, and perspectives before jumping to solutions.   Imagine you’re planning a surprise party for a friend. Instead of guessing what they might enjoy, you take a moment to step into their shoes. What do they love? A quiet dinner with close friends or a lively gathering? By empathizing, you ensure the party is a heartfelt success, not just a ticked-off task.   In life coa...

 In a recent coaching session, I worked with an employee struggling with repeated quality errors and mistakes. As we dove into the conversation, he shared that he was constantly anxious about how his work would be perceived. He worried that, no matter what he did, something would inevitably go wrong. This led him to overthink every detail, which only seemed to create more mistakes, ironically reinforcing his fears. He described the cycle as exhausting and frustrating, feeling as if he was never able to meet the mark he set for himself. In his words "It is exhausting to be fearful." Listening to his concerns, I could sense that a significant part of the issue was his fear of being judged. He was so focused on the potential for negative feedback that it had become a self-fulfilling prophecy, overshadowing his confidence and focus. I paused, then asked him, “If you could quiet that inner fear of judgment, what would you say to yourself instead? And how would that feel?” He took ...

 Image taken from Link- https://pin.it/2rARWplxe In my previous blog, I discussed the initial stages of Peter Senge's model for building a shared vision: telling and selling. These stages involve communicating the vision to others and persuading them to embrace it. In this blog, I'll delve into the subsequent stages: testing, consulting, and co-creating. Testing Before engaging stakeholders in a more collaborative process, it's essential to test the vision to ensure it's feasible, practical, and aligned with the organization's goals. This stage, known as testing, involves letting employees experiment with the vision, put it to use, and assess the outcomes. By gathering feedback and insights from these experiments, leaders can identify potential challenges, refine the vision, and build a stronger foundation for future implementation. For example, imagine a company that is considering a new work-from-home policy. In the testing stage, the leadership team might pilot t...

We are once again celebrating excellence at ZS as We Won the Brandon Hall Awards. I am thrilled to share that my organisation ZS has been recognized with the prestigious Brandon Hall Awards for our outstanding Learning and Development (L&D) function and Diversity and Inclusion (D&I) initiatives. As a proud member of the Talent Development team, I've had the privilege of witnessing firsthand the dedication, creativity, and passion that goes into crafting exceptional training programs. In this blog, I'll take you through our journey to achieving this remarkable feat. At ZS, we believe that learning is a continuous journey, not a destination. Our team is committed to designing and delivering training programs that are engaging, relevant, and impactful. We take a holistic approach, considering the diverse needs and perspectives of our learners. Our goal is to empower employees with the skills, knowledge, and mindset to excel in their roles and drive business success. So, wh...

In my previous blog, I discussed the Telling stage of shared vision development. Today, I want to explore the Selling stage, where leaders actively promote the vision and seek to persuade others of its merits. The Selling stage is a more interactive approach than the Telling stage, as it involves engaging with stakeholders and addressing their concerns. However, it can still be somewhat top-down, as the ultimate decision-making authority rests with the leader. I've witnessed the Selling stage firsthand in various organizations. One example that comes to mind is when a senior manager proposed a new project to the team. Rather than simply announcing the project, the manager took the time to explain the rationale behind it, highlight the potential benefits, and address any concerns or questions. I remember the team being quite fond of the leadership style of involving them, as previously they were always facing telling by the leader. Another instance occurred when a team leader was tr...

  Picture yourself in a meeting where you are talking a download of the vision of your organization from the top management and you are tasked to translate it to the teams to get the work done. I am sure it's not difficult to picture this as we all have been there and done that. In my previous blog, I discussed the 5 stages of shared vision as pointed out by Senge in his book Schools that Learn. I will like to share my experiences of each stage in the coming blogs.  The Telling stage of shared vision development: Today, I want to explore the challenges I faced as an HR manager when implementing a top-down vision. While the Telling stage can be effective in providing clear direction, it can also present challenges for those tasked with translating the vision into actionable steps. In my experience, one of the biggest hurdles was ensuring that I fully understood and internalized the vision before communicating it to my team. When the top management outlined the company's strateg...

  In the realm of coaching, the art of listening often trumps the skill of speaking. While a coach's questions can guide a client, it's the silent moments that truly unlock the potential for deep reflection and transformative insights. Imagine a coaching session with a high-performing executive struggling with work-life balance. They've been juggling demanding projects, a growing family, and a desire for personal fulfillment. As they describe their challenges, the executive's voice gradually slows down, their tone becoming more subdued. This is where silence becomes a potent tool. Instead of offering immediate advice or solutions, the coach chooses to simply listen. The silence that follows doesn't feel awkward; it's a space created for the client to delve deeper into their thoughts and emotions. As the silence stretches on, the executive begins to explore uncharted territories of their mind. They start to question their priorities, their values, and their defin...

  Account for What You Know, while celebrating progress and embracing growth" As I reflect on my journey, I've come to realize that it's not about who's ahead of me, but about how far I've come. It's easy to get caught up in comparing ourselves to others, but this mindset only leads to discouragement and neglects our own accomplishments. Instead, I've learned to focus on my progress, no matter how small it may seem. I'm proud of the achievements I've made, the skills I've developed, and the knowledge I've acquired. It's essential to acknowledge and celebrate our successes, rather than discounting them. However, I've also come to understand that there's grace in not knowing everything. It's okay to acknowledge the areas where I need growth and learning. I'm proud to be on a path of continuous learning, embracing new experiences, and expanding my knowledge. And it is also true that only if I do not know there will be a cont...

 I recently had the privilege of mentoring a second-year undergraduate student through a volunteer assignment from my organization. Our discussion revolved around the significance of career choices, with the student expressing a strong inclination towards government jobs for the dignity and societal identity they offer. I took the opportunity to share a valuable insight – it's not merely about the job title or sector, but the value one brings to their work. I emphasized that expertise attracts attention, regardless of the domain. As our conversation unfolded, the student raised the common question of the importance of obtaining certificates. I debunked the notion that it's just a piece of paper by highlighting that it serves as proof of credibility. However, I added that the true value lies in the knowledge gained during education, turning it into a lifelong achievement. A certificate not only provides a starting point for a career but also signifies a commitment to continuous ...

  In the pursuit of success, the journey is often marked by persistent efforts and unwavering determination. While the significance of hard work cannot be understated, it is essential to recognize that success is ultimately measured by its outcome. Efforts, no matter how dedicated, find their true value when they manifest into tangible results. Success is not merely a product of laborious toil but a reflection of the goals achieved, milestones crossed, and objectives realized. The outcome becomes the yardstick against which success is gauged. Consider a business venture – the countless hours spent strategizing, planning, and executing are truly valuable when the venture flourishes, attaining profitability and market recognition. Similarly, in personal endeavors, be it academics, sports, or any creative pursuit, the true measure of success lies in the end result. This perspective doesn't diminish the importance of efforts; instead, it emphasizes the dynamic relationship between effo...

 You never celebrate your past in life, you always celebrate the present and look forward to the future. In the tapestry of life, our past experiences weave a rich and colorful backdrop. However, clinging to past glory can act as an anchor, we are over pleased with ourselves, this prevents us from sailing into new and innovative territories. This is especially true in the realms of relationships and work, where the winds of change constantly blow. Let's explore why it's crucial to break free from the shackles of the past and embrace the transformative power of change. The Pitfalls of Living in the Past are Stagnation in Relationships and professional settings. Living in the shadow of past accomplishments can hinder personal growth and strain relationships. What once worked may not necessarily be relevant now. It's vital to evolve together, foster open communication and adapt to the changing dynamics of relationships. In the workplace, resting on past laurels can impede prof...

Today I'ed like to talk about 'The Invaluable Lessons of Necessity: A Teacher Beyond Compare' In the journey of life, necessity often emerges as a compelling teacher, guiding us through challenges and imparting lessons that transcend conventional learning environments. It is through necessity that we often find ourselves pushed to acquire new skills, innovate, and rise above our perceived limitations. In this blog, we will explore the profound impact of necessity as a teacher, drawing insights from personal experiences in navigating the realms of professional growth, creative pursuits, and academic endeavors. Embracing Change at the Workplace One of the most common arenas where necessity acts as a transformative teacher is the workplace. When faced with the need to adapt to new technologies or software, individuals are often thrust into a realm of discomfort that demands quick learning and application. Take, for instance, the experience of learning a new software at the off...

  The vocabulary we use affects our thoughts. The words make us either ruminate over our past or think of how we can welcome our future. A simple difference of one letter makes two different words 'than' and 'then'. The former when used in sentences states comparison. It could be comparing someone with others, comparing past and present. If the comparison is healthy, it will lead to positive thoughts. But if the comparison is to show a sign of insufficiency, then it will just lead to dissatisfaction. My friend is poor than Sheela's friend. My car is smaller than Rahul's car. Even if we are using the word than for a positive position, is that a healthy comparison? If it is, well and good. However, if it is not then we must give it a thought.  I am cleaver than my sister. I am fitter than my colleague. On the other hand the latter, the word 'then'. It is usually used for indicating possibility, what are the possible next steps, then whats next. Some reflec...

  What do we do to lift each other up? Have you been helping others in need, supporting people around you, collaborating with a colleague for sharing a learning? Everything in life and everybody in life, by nature, we co-exist. In reference to co existence i came across this article on coexistence with nature. In a village Chandapani, in the outskirts of Guwahati, a farmer named Bodo grows paddy, which is a seasonal crop. There are many elephants in that area who come often to destroy the crop. So much of crop gets destroyed before the harvest and it is a big loss for the farmer.   In the given circumstances, the way a human living in a city would think, i put some mind to it. The way we are cutting trees and making concrete jungles everywhere, the farmer must also be doing something to keep off the menance. While this is generally true that either humans would drive the elephants away or probably get killed by their wild side, in this case of Bodo, things were different. Th...

There is no point in setting goals and not working towards them in any way. I get asked many times, what do you do to begin doing a certain tasks like learning, managing your studies, or even get the motivation for cleaning your drawer, or finish a certificate course. Yes we all begin doing these things or at least plan to in our minds. But what is the mindset when it comes to actually doing it.  According to me it is just doing that one step at a time. It's breaking the chain of thinking that i will do it, to actually doing that task. So what to just start doing is: Making sure you are consistent and taking step at a time towards the goal. Making sure that a movement is made , even if slow or small. Remember not to try to achieve everything at one go. It's ok to be small, that is break down the task and then conquer in bits. Check your direction whether it's the right direction in which you are moving.. And never doubt in yourself if you are doing the right thing or you ar...

At times you wonder, what can you do different for other people around you? Can you do something which they will remember you for a lifetime? Well we all have that potential to do something which is so difference that people remember us for it. Have you ever thought why people write there autobiography? Yes most of the times they write to inspire others. They want to celebrate their life story. They want to inspire others by talking about the successes and struggles they have been through, the steps they took towards success, they want to talk about what are the take away which others can also follow or maybe tweak something in that and then follow. Your Stories can inspire someone to pursue their dream. Never doubt the impact of sharing it. I do understand that everyone is just living their life and may not have the thought and time to share their stories. However the truth is there is so many so so many of us who have wonderful stories to share and to get inspired from. Do we all req...

  The real treasure of your life. What is it?  Most of us feel at the first instance that its our job, house, car, jewellery, savings, investments.  But then if we reflect these are the things which give us hedonic happiness. That is when they are there or we get more of it, then we are happ. In absence of these, our happiness reduces or vanishes.  In reality these material items are just instrumental in providing a good life, health, peace of mind, and loving relationships.  Going even further, once we have all of this we still strive to achieve meaning and purpose, flourish in life, make life beautiful for others and make use of our existence. This is eudiamonic happiness. That is it comes from within and we can have it inspite of the kinds of turns external events take. Treasure has different connotations for different individuals, depending on their lifestyle, their experiences, their stafe of living, their stage of evolution and maturity. For some it may be...

  We live in a society with presumptions and assumptions of things. We can't help but have so many of them held by ourselves.  Things which are to be done in a particular way, should be that way. My child was painting and drawing in her colour book. Although it was messy art, I loved her idea of not colouring a zebra black and white, and not giving a cow the white colour. I know that does not fit the bill, but it does give her a chance to show her creativity. I let her do it. In my mind I was arguing, is she learning the right colours of the animal, but in my heart I wanted her to include all colours in her drawing and be open to using her creativity. In everything we do, we look at how to do it, what is the right way. Be it dressing, eating, or even making new things. We are conditioned to seek symmetry and be one with the crowd. This is social psychology is called conformity bias, the idea of confirming to everything others say, do, in order to be liked, in order to be an in...

  Once upon the time there was a huge oak tree which stood proudly on the banks of a river in the forest. At the foot of the oak there grew many reeds . They often spoke to each other about how different life is for them. The oak said he could view far and have a 360 degree view of the surroundings.  He seemed very proud of his height and slender self. The reeds listened silenty and also at times advised the oak to look at the ground to know what is happening right where they are growing. The oak refused to look down and bow down. He said flexibility is not my nature.  Just then, the winds turned vicious, the soil started to loosen, crazy winds took over. The oak tree, sticking to its nature, did not flex and uprooted. While the reeds bowed, flexed and stuck to the soil, they survived the storm.  Times demand us to be flexible, bow down when we know we can't stand tall, and take alternate routes when required. If we don't budge stating it's our nature, then the loss ...