Understanding Human Psychology

 Parenting, I’ve realized, is less about teaching and more about learning. In the early days, I would get so worked up watching my daughter mix all her paint colours into a brownish mush, splattering it across the paper—and sometimes, her face and hands. I would cringe at the mess, the stained clothes, the stickiness of it all. “Why can’t she just stick to the colouring book?” I’d ask myself. But one day, something shifted. I watched her dip her fingers into the red, then yellow, then blue. She wasn’t just painting—she was exploring . She was learning how red turns orange, how paint feels on skin, how colours mix to create new ones. It was all sensory play: touch, sight, even smell. It was art. It was science. It was joy. And I was the one who was missing the point. She wasn’t making a mess—she was making meaning. From that day on, I began to pause before reacting. I began to see her world, not through my lens of order, but through hers of discovery. I learned to breathe, smile, an...

  Today, I want to share a little story about my child and how I’m seeing her grow up in the most beautiful way. Recently, I’ve noticed how curious she has become. She asks so many questions — “What is this?”, “What are you doing?”, “What is happening?” Her questions come from a place of pure curiosity, wanting to understand everything around her. When she’s playing and building her own little stories, she often asks, “What is the character feeling?” If she’s watching a movie, she notices the emotions too. She’ll say, “Why is this person sad?” or “Did she feel bad when that happened?” She talks about emotions — happiness, sadness, excitement — with such innocence and clarity. What amazes me even more is how she connects emotions with behaviors. She notices things adults do — in the kitchen, outside, or even while handling something risky — and asks about them too. It’s a reminder of how children grow: through constant engagement, through questions, through wonder. Watching her make...

This post contains affiliate links. If you buy through them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. I thought traveling with my child would be smooth—fun, even. I imagined picturesque moments, laughter, and seamless transitions. But reality? It was difficult . We don’t travel often, and when we did, my child wasn’t used to new places, new faces, or a shift from her familiar world. She withdrew, cried, threw tantrums. At first, I felt irritated, even embarrassed. I wanted this trip to be a break for me, but instead, I was navigating meltdowns in an unfamiliar setting. Yet, something shifted. Instead of holding onto frustration, I saw things through her eyes. Her world is built on routine—her grandparents, her school, her safe little bubble. Suddenly, she was in a different place with different people, and it was overwhelming. So, I adjusted. I found ways to make the trip enjoyable for her, offering little moments of familiarity amidst the newness. I carved out time...

  Have you ever wondered how often we present a different version of ourselves to the world? The term "genuine" is thrown around casually, but how often do we truly embody it? In today's world, it seems like people are increasingly adept at wearing masks, carefully curating their online personas and projecting a facade of perfection. Why do we feel compelled to hide our true selves? Is it fear of judgment, a desire to fit in, or perhaps a misguided belief that authenticity is a weakness? Whatever the reason, this constant performance can take a toll on our mental health. It's exhausting to constantly be on guard, to be alert for any potential missteps that might expose our true selves. I've observed this phenomenon firsthand. People often put on fake smiles, offer insincere compliments, and express love that feels hollow. While there are undoubtedly genuine individuals out there, it seems that the pressures of society often drive us to adopt a persona that aligns ...

 Image taken from Link- https://pin.it/2rARWplxe In my previous blog, I discussed the initial stages of Peter Senge's model for building a shared vision: telling and selling. These stages involve communicating the vision to others and persuading them to embrace it. In this blog, I'll delve into the subsequent stages: testing, consulting, and co-creating. Testing Before engaging stakeholders in a more collaborative process, it's essential to test the vision to ensure it's feasible, practical, and aligned with the organization's goals. This stage, known as testing, involves letting employees experiment with the vision, put it to use, and assess the outcomes. By gathering feedback and insights from these experiments, leaders can identify potential challenges, refine the vision, and build a stronger foundation for future implementation. For example, imagine a company that is considering a new work-from-home policy. In the testing stage, the leadership team might pilot t...

In my previous blog, I discussed the Telling stage of shared vision development. Today, I want to explore the Selling stage, where leaders actively promote the vision and seek to persuade others of its merits. The Selling stage is a more interactive approach than the Telling stage, as it involves engaging with stakeholders and addressing their concerns. However, it can still be somewhat top-down, as the ultimate decision-making authority rests with the leader. I've witnessed the Selling stage firsthand in various organizations. One example that comes to mind is when a senior manager proposed a new project to the team. Rather than simply announcing the project, the manager took the time to explain the rationale behind it, highlight the potential benefits, and address any concerns or questions. I remember the team being quite fond of the leadership style of involving them, as previously they were always facing telling by the leader. Another instance occurred when a team leader was tr...

  Picture yourself in a meeting where you are talking a download of the vision of your organization from the top management and you are tasked to translate it to the teams to get the work done. I am sure it's not difficult to picture this as we all have been there and done that. In my previous blog, I discussed the 5 stages of shared vision as pointed out by Senge in his book Schools that Learn. I will like to share my experiences of each stage in the coming blogs.  The Telling stage of shared vision development: Today, I want to explore the challenges I faced as an HR manager when implementing a top-down vision. While the Telling stage can be effective in providing clear direction, it can also present challenges for those tasked with translating the vision into actionable steps. In my experience, one of the biggest hurdles was ensuring that I fully understood and internalized the vision before communicating it to my team. When the top management outlined the company's strateg...

  Peter Senge, in his influential book "Schools That Learn," introduced the concept of the assembly line in education. This concept, borrowed from the industrial age, where assembly lines led to mass production, standardization and quality management. This suggests a sequential approach to learning, where one thing follows another, one process finishes before another starts. Linearity started making way in all aspects of our life, even education. While this model has been effective in certain respects, it can also limit our ability to think critically and holistically about life. The assembly line model in education is characterized by standardized curricula, a focus on grades and exams, and a linear progression through academic levels. While these elements can provide structure and efficiency, they can also stifle creativity and critical thinking. By emphasizing rote learning, focussing on grades and individual components, the assembly line model can overlook the interconnec...

  As I turn a year older, I find myself reflecting on my journey as a coach. What started as a role to facilitate growth and progress for others, has become a catalyst for my own growth. Through conversations with myself, I've come to realize that coaching is not just about helping others achieve their goals, but also about working on myself. As I progress in this role, I've learned that self-awareness is key. I've had to confront my own biases, limitations, and areas for improvement. It's been a humbling experience, but also a liberating one. With each conversation, I've gained new insights and perspectives, allowing me to become a better coach and person. My growth has been progressive, with each success and setback teaching me valuable lessons. I've set goals, achieved some, and adjusted others. Through it all, I've come to understand that coaching is not a destination, but a journey of continuous learning and self-improvement. As I look ahead, I'm ex...

  As a coach, I've encountered numerous individuals struggling with self-doubt and negative self-perception. Recently, a coachee asked a poignant question: "Do bad thoughts make me a bad person?" My response was simple yet profound: "The waves are not the ocean." At first, the coachee was taken aback, responding with a thoughtful "huh." This moment of realization was a turning point in our session. The metaphor struck a chord, allowing them to see their thoughts and emotions in a new light. Just as the ocean is vast and deep, encompassing both calm and turbulent waters, our minds are complex and multifaceted. The waves on the surface represent our thoughts and emotions, ever-changing and sometimes turbulent. However, they do not define the entirety of the ocean. Similarly, our thoughts and emotions do not define our true nature. This metaphor helped my coachee understand that their negative thoughts and emotions were mere waves, not a reflection of the...

  In the realm of coaching, the art of listening often trumps the skill of speaking. While a coach's questions can guide a client, it's the silent moments that truly unlock the potential for deep reflection and transformative insights. Imagine a coaching session with a high-performing executive struggling with work-life balance. They've been juggling demanding projects, a growing family, and a desire for personal fulfillment. As they describe their challenges, the executive's voice gradually slows down, their tone becoming more subdued. This is where silence becomes a potent tool. Instead of offering immediate advice or solutions, the coach chooses to simply listen. The silence that follows doesn't feel awkward; it's a space created for the client to delve deeper into their thoughts and emotions. As the silence stretches on, the executive begins to explore uncharted territories of their mind. They start to question their priorities, their values, and their defin...

 The World is Perfect, We Look at It Imperfectly Let's first learn about the Search for the Left-Handed Mug. There once was a left-handed man who lived in a right-handed world. Everything, from designs to molds, seemed to be made with the right-handed person in mind. His biggest problem was finding a mug. Every shop, mall, and store had mugs with handles on the right side. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t find a mug made for left-handed people. One day, he entered a shop. With little hope, he asked about a left-handed mug. The shopkeeper listened carefully and said, "Interesting, that's a special kind of mug. We have a special stock, but it's a bit expensive." The man's eyes lit up. He immediately agreed. The shopkeeper brought something from the back. The man was surprised. They were the same ordinary mugs, but with a slight difference. The handles were reversed. The handle that should have been on the right was now on the left. The man looked at the ...

  Account for What You Know, while celebrating progress and embracing growth" As I reflect on my journey, I've come to realize that it's not about who's ahead of me, but about how far I've come. It's easy to get caught up in comparing ourselves to others, but this mindset only leads to discouragement and neglects our own accomplishments. Instead, I've learned to focus on my progress, no matter how small it may seem. I'm proud of the achievements I've made, the skills I've developed, and the knowledge I've acquired. It's essential to acknowledge and celebrate our successes, rather than discounting them. However, I've also come to understand that there's grace in not knowing everything. It's okay to acknowledge the areas where I need growth and learning. I'm proud to be on a path of continuous learning, embracing new experiences, and expanding my knowledge. And it is also true that only if I do not know there will be a cont...

    In the intricate dance of human interaction, our emotions often become mirrors, reflecting back our inner selves. Whether it's anger, disrespect, or love, each emotion we project onto others reveals more about us than about those at whom it's directed. Understanding this can shield our inner peace from the storms of external turmoil. Consider the tale of Aparna, a fresh-faced assistant professor navigating the labyrinth of academia. Amidst supportive colleagues stood one imposing figure, Dr. Meera, whose authoritarian demeanor belied her scholarly prowess. Dr. Meera's condescending commands weighed heavily on Aparna. There was once a time that Dr. Meera told Aparna to tend to faculty area and cabin cleanliness, putting forward that she is junior and it is her responsibility —an edict that left Aparna feeling diminished. Summoning courage, Aparna sought solace in the wisdom of the institution's director, Dr. Nandini. Their conversation was a lifeline, affirming Aparn...

  In a world that celebrates diversity in all its forms, there is a growing recognition of the unique strengths and perspectives that neurodiverse individuals bring to society. From autism spectrum disorder (ASD) to attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and beyond, neurodiversity encompasses a spectrum of neurological variations that shape the way individuals experience and interact with the world. Rather than viewing neurodiversity through a lens of deficit or disorder, it's time to embrace the multitude of talents and capabilities that neurodiverse individuals possess. By recognizing and accommodating their unique needs, we can unlock a wealth of benefits for both individuals and society as a whole. One of the most striking aspects of neurodiversity is the diversity of thought and creativity it brings to the table. Neurodiverse individuals often possess a keen eye for detail, innovative problem-solving skills, and a fresh perspective that can lead to breakthroughs in va...

 I recently had the privilege of mentoring a second-year undergraduate student through a volunteer assignment from my organization. Our discussion revolved around the significance of career choices, with the student expressing a strong inclination towards government jobs for the dignity and societal identity they offer. I took the opportunity to share a valuable insight – it's not merely about the job title or sector, but the value one brings to their work. I emphasized that expertise attracts attention, regardless of the domain. As our conversation unfolded, the student raised the common question of the importance of obtaining certificates. I debunked the notion that it's just a piece of paper by highlighting that it serves as proof of credibility. However, I added that the true value lies in the knowledge gained during education, turning it into a lifelong achievement. A certificate not only provides a starting point for a career but also signifies a commitment to continuous ...

  In the pursuit of success, the journey is often marked by persistent efforts and unwavering determination. While the significance of hard work cannot be understated, it is essential to recognize that success is ultimately measured by its outcome. Efforts, no matter how dedicated, find their true value when they manifest into tangible results. Success is not merely a product of laborious toil but a reflection of the goals achieved, milestones crossed, and objectives realized. The outcome becomes the yardstick against which success is gauged. Consider a business venture – the countless hours spent strategizing, planning, and executing are truly valuable when the venture flourishes, attaining profitability and market recognition. Similarly, in personal endeavors, be it academics, sports, or any creative pursuit, the true measure of success lies in the end result. This perspective doesn't diminish the importance of efforts; instead, it emphasizes the dynamic relationship between effo...

 You never celebrate your past in life, you always celebrate the present and look forward to the future. In the tapestry of life, our past experiences weave a rich and colorful backdrop. However, clinging to past glory can act as an anchor, we are over pleased with ourselves, this prevents us from sailing into new and innovative territories. This is especially true in the realms of relationships and work, where the winds of change constantly blow. Let's explore why it's crucial to break free from the shackles of the past and embrace the transformative power of change. The Pitfalls of Living in the Past are Stagnation in Relationships and professional settings. Living in the shadow of past accomplishments can hinder personal growth and strain relationships. What once worked may not necessarily be relevant now. It's vital to evolve together, foster open communication and adapt to the changing dynamics of relationships. In the workplace, resting on past laurels can impede prof...

  In the pursuit of success, the mantra "hard work pays off". While this has echoed through the corridors of ambition for generations. As we approach the year-end, I take this opportunity to reflect on the role of relentless effort in achieving some of my goals. In my life, hard work is undoubtedly a crucial ingredient for success. Hard work is the backbone of achievement and molds aspirations into reality. I never fail to see my dreams come to life by consistently promising myself to take action.  I have been chasing some major goals in the past few days, which has kept me away from writing my blog. But I look forward to dedicating my soul to achieving my goals. The fruits of success are sweet.  2023, has also kept me motivated, as all year round I've been doing what I do best. That is interacting with people, getting to know them, train people, coach people. Thankyou for this 2023! In the coming year, I wish that everyone embrace a new challenge, a new goal. I would als...

  The vocabulary we use affects our thoughts. The words make us either ruminate over our past or think of how we can welcome our future. A simple difference of one letter makes two different words 'than' and 'then'. The former when used in sentences states comparison. It could be comparing someone with others, comparing past and present. If the comparison is healthy, it will lead to positive thoughts. But if the comparison is to show a sign of insufficiency, then it will just lead to dissatisfaction. My friend is poor than Sheela's friend. My car is smaller than Rahul's car. Even if we are using the word than for a positive position, is that a healthy comparison? If it is, well and good. However, if it is not then we must give it a thought.  I am cleaver than my sister. I am fitter than my colleague. On the other hand the latter, the word 'then'. It is usually used for indicating possibility, what are the possible next steps, then whats next. Some reflec...