Understanding Human Psychology

What has this year brought to me? I asked myself today. It's a whirlwind of emotions of joy and tears, it's a plethora of events which are wins and losses, it's a bag full of memories of laughter and cries, and stories which I remember to take to the coming year. After ending the year 2023 with my PhD thesis submission, I start this year with preparation for my viva, in anticipation of the feedback from my examiners. In the meantime, I dealt with a loss, which will always remain very personal, my dear aunt Dr. Katy Gandevia who was not just my aunt, but in my mind she was equal to my mother. This year also brought many family members to rekindle lost relationships, and many who served relations without a thought. This year in May, after I received the thesis feedback from my examiners, I have defended my thesis and given viva on 16th May, and achieved the highest education and title of Dr.  During the same time I received my NLP Master Practitioner Certification, which I wo...

Have you ever felt the weight of social expectations? The invisible force pushing you to conform, to fit a mold that wasn’t quite yours? This is the subtle, yet powerful influence of peer and social pressure. It’s a common experience, regardless of age. When I came across this in one of my conversations, it made me think, don't we all feel the same regardless of age, gender, stage of life we are. As teenagers, we often feel the need to belong to a certain group, to be accepted. We tend to follow celebrities who we may not idolise, just because that is a hot topic discussed in our peer group, we may land up watching a tv series to talk about it with friends, we may adopt some habits which do not fit in our routine, just to be with a group. But the question is to what extent is this healthy? This can lead to compromising our values or doing things we wouldn’t normally do. But it’s important to remember that true friends will accept you for who you are, not who they want you to be. Ev...

  Yesterday, I had the immense honor of receiving the GEN AI Jam Team award for the third time. It was a truly surreal moment, made even more special by the fact that I was wearing the same dress I wore for the previous two wins at ITAD in 2017 and ES in 2021. It was a hat trick, not just in terms of the award, but also in the attire! This experience has reinforced my belief in the power of convictions and the incredible things we can achieve when we work together as a team. I'm incredibly grateful for the opportunity to be a part of such an innovative and inspiring community.

  My leader often keeps saying this, "A good coaching session is like therapy." Coaching is a space where we, as coaches, hold many emotions for the client.  At times what we can see the client's low spiral emotions are coming from irrational beliefs about the world, which the client is unable to perceive. In the course of the session I have come across times when the client goes into a vulnerable zone and starts to shed of the old belief and attempts to form a new belief. This process, not easy definitely, makes clients face a tsunami of emotions. Overwhelmed the client may also break down and cry. How as a coach we hold the space for the person to just be? Usually I have seen the period of new belief formation come after a strong realisation the client feels about a situation, in the course of the coaching conversation. This is generally followed by hmmm and aha and loads of pauses. Silence plays a beutiful role here for allowing the client to absorb and adopt the new b...

  Recently I was designing a workshop on problem solving, when I included the concept of design thinking as one of the topics. I understood it as one of the most effective ways to approach any business problem. I delved into it deeper for understanding and realised that it can act as a guiding tool in any situation. Design Thinking isn’t just for designers of a product or a service—it’s a way of solving problems that fits right into our daily lives. At its heart is the stage of Empathize. The first step towards this approach. This step reminds us to pause and truly understand others’ needs, feelings, and perspectives before jumping to solutions.   Imagine you’re planning a surprise party for a friend. Instead of guessing what they might enjoy, you take a moment to step into their shoes. What do they love? A quiet dinner with close friends or a lively gathering? By empathizing, you ensure the party is a heartfelt success, not just a ticked-off task.   In life coa...

  LXD, a powerful tool, has grown significantly over the years, for managing learning in both in-person and virtual environments. the knowledge you gain out of LXD courses is versatile from the understanding of technology use in learning, to understanding of different learning environments need to be managed, to understanding universal design principles, to understanding the theoretical foundations of LXD.  The pandemic accelerated this growth, as remote work became the norm. LXD's ability to set up consistent development environments from anywhere became even more valuable. It helped learning content developers, learning program owners and learning professionals stay effectively productive, regardless of location (in person or remote). To keep up with the times, LXD has embraced new technologies. The number of tools which I use as a learning professional today in the classroom is nothing compared to what I used 10 years ago.  As LXD continues to evolve and take shape, wi...

  Life is like a dance to the rhythm and melody which is unique to each person. As coaches, we aren’t the ones orchestrating the music for any client or even leading the dance; instead, we are like musical notes. The notes are essential elements that guide, uplift, and harmonize with our clients’ journeys. The client is like the orchestrator of his own life’s music. Each coaching session is like creating a symphony of growth, clarity, and purpose, where the client is both the composer, orchestrator and performer. Here’s how, in my experience, coaching mirrors musical notes, with each aspect adding depth and resonance to a client’s life. I will divide this into 5 sections of musical notes, depicting 5 different stages in a coaching session.   1. The Opening Note: Establishing Trust and Rhythm The start of any coaching relationship is like the opening notes of a song. It sets the tone, establishes the rhythm, and builds trust—the foundation for everything that follows. I...

 In a recent coaching session, I worked with an employee struggling with repeated quality errors and mistakes. As we dove into the conversation, he shared that he was constantly anxious about how his work would be perceived. He worried that, no matter what he did, something would inevitably go wrong. This led him to overthink every detail, which only seemed to create more mistakes, ironically reinforcing his fears. He described the cycle as exhausting and frustrating, feeling as if he was never able to meet the mark he set for himself. In his words "It is exhausting to be fearful." Listening to his concerns, I could sense that a significant part of the issue was his fear of being judged. He was so focused on the potential for negative feedback that it had become a self-fulfilling prophecy, overshadowing his confidence and focus. I paused, then asked him, “If you could quiet that inner fear of judgment, what would you say to yourself instead? And how would that feel?” He took ...

  The past few days have been a whirlwind of self-exploration as I dive into a course on Positive Intelligence by Shirzad Chamine. It’s a transformative approach that’s reshaping how I envision my future, encouraging me to live more fully in the present. The course is all about activating what it calls the “Sage Mind”—essentially, cultivating a mindset rooted in awareness, presence, and genuine happiness. In many ways, it aligns closely with mindfulness, yet it goes beyond by offering tools to ground myself in the here and now, savoring each moment as it unfolds. One of the most impactful aspects of Positive Intelligence is how it encourages daily practices to strengthen presence. I’ve found myself more attuned to my thoughts and emotions, reminding myself to pause and truly be where I am. This daily focus has been instrumental. Whenever I feel my mind drifting into worries about the future, or reminiscing about the past, I gently guide it back to what’s in front of me, fully engag...

  Have you ever wondered how often we present a different version of ourselves to the world? The term "genuine" is thrown around casually, but how often do we truly embody it? In today's world, it seems like people are increasingly adept at wearing masks, carefully curating their online personas and projecting a facade of perfection. Why do we feel compelled to hide our true selves? Is it fear of judgment, a desire to fit in, or perhaps a misguided belief that authenticity is a weakness? Whatever the reason, this constant performance can take a toll on our mental health. It's exhausting to constantly be on guard, to be alert for any potential missteps that might expose our true selves. I've observed this phenomenon firsthand. People often put on fake smiles, offer insincere compliments, and express love that feels hollow. While there are undoubtedly genuine individuals out there, it seems that the pressures of society often drive us to adopt a persona that aligns ...

  I recently had a fascinating conversation with my daughter that highlighted the power of childlike curiosity and innovative thinking. We were painting together, and she was using her brush and poster colours for scene of a bathtub and a small child playing and splashing water. As my daughter mixed different paints to create new colors, I was struck by her ability to think creatively and logically. When she mixed red and blue to make purple, I was impressed with her understanding of color theory and her recall must have been through some YouTube videos. However, I was truly amazed when she later decided to color the water in the bathtub a very dark blue. When I questioned her choice, she explained that it was nighttime, so the water should be dark. This simple explanation revealed a deep understanding of the relationship between time, setting, and color. It also demonstrated her ability to think outside the box and come up with creative solutions and her imagination of the context...

 Image taken from Link- https://pin.it/2rARWplxe In my previous blog, I discussed the initial stages of Peter Senge's model for building a shared vision: telling and selling. These stages involve communicating the vision to others and persuading them to embrace it. In this blog, I'll delve into the subsequent stages: testing, consulting, and co-creating. Testing Before engaging stakeholders in a more collaborative process, it's essential to test the vision to ensure it's feasible, practical, and aligned with the organization's goals. This stage, known as testing, involves letting employees experiment with the vision, put it to use, and assess the outcomes. By gathering feedback and insights from these experiments, leaders can identify potential challenges, refine the vision, and build a stronger foundation for future implementation. For example, imagine a company that is considering a new work-from-home policy. In the testing stage, the leadership team might pilot t...

Today is the day I've been waiting for—my PhD convocation. It feels surreal to finally be here, wearing the coveted doctoral shawl at TISS that feels like a cape on my shoulders. I'm filled with a sense of empowerment and accomplishment, a feeling that's been years in the making. This moment isn't just about the degree. It's a culmination of countless hours of research, writing, and perseverance. It's a testament to the resilience and determination I've developed throughout this journey. My PhD has taught me so much more than just academic knowledge. It has shaped me into a more confident, capable, and well-rounded individual. One of the most valuable lessons I've learned is the importance of building relationships. Collaborating with others has been instrumental in my success. I've learned how to work effectively with diverse teams, negotiate deals, and foster mutual respect.  Setting and achieving goals has also been a key component of my PhD journ...

We are once again celebrating excellence at ZS as We Won the Brandon Hall Awards. I am thrilled to share that my organisation ZS has been recognized with the prestigious Brandon Hall Awards for our outstanding Learning and Development (L&D) function and Diversity and Inclusion (D&I) initiatives. As a proud member of the Talent Development team, I've had the privilege of witnessing firsthand the dedication, creativity, and passion that goes into crafting exceptional training programs. In this blog, I'll take you through our journey to achieving this remarkable feat. At ZS, we believe that learning is a continuous journey, not a destination. Our team is committed to designing and delivering training programs that are engaging, relevant, and impactful. We take a holistic approach, considering the diverse needs and perspectives of our learners. Our goal is to empower employees with the skills, knowledge, and mindset to excel in their roles and drive business success. So, wh...

In my previous blog, I discussed the Telling stage of shared vision development. Today, I want to explore the Selling stage, where leaders actively promote the vision and seek to persuade others of its merits. The Selling stage is a more interactive approach than the Telling stage, as it involves engaging with stakeholders and addressing their concerns. However, it can still be somewhat top-down, as the ultimate decision-making authority rests with the leader. I've witnessed the Selling stage firsthand in various organizations. One example that comes to mind is when a senior manager proposed a new project to the team. Rather than simply announcing the project, the manager took the time to explain the rationale behind it, highlight the potential benefits, and address any concerns or questions. I remember the team being quite fond of the leadership style of involving them, as previously they were always facing telling by the leader. Another instance occurred when a team leader was tr...

  Picture yourself in a meeting where you are talking a download of the vision of your organization from the top management and you are tasked to translate it to the teams to get the work done. I am sure it's not difficult to picture this as we all have been there and done that. In my previous blog, I discussed the 5 stages of shared vision as pointed out by Senge in his book Schools that Learn. I will like to share my experiences of each stage in the coming blogs.  The Telling stage of shared vision development: Today, I want to explore the challenges I faced as an HR manager when implementing a top-down vision. While the Telling stage can be effective in providing clear direction, it can also present challenges for those tasked with translating the vision into actionable steps. In my experience, one of the biggest hurdles was ensuring that I fully understood and internalized the vision before communicating it to my team. When the top management outlined the company's strateg...

 Image taken from book Schools that Learn by PETER SENGE, NELDA CAMBRON-McCABE, TIMOTHY LUCAS, BRYAN SMITH, JANIS DUTTON, ART KLEINER Peter Senge's groundbreaking book, *The Fifth Discipline*, introduced the concept of a Learning Organization. Central to this concept is the idea of a shared vision, a process of aligning individuals and teams towards a common goal. Senge outlines five stages of shared vision development: Telling, Selling, Testing, Consulting, and Co-Creating. Over the years, I've witnessed these stages firsthand in various organizations. In my early career, I experienced the "Telling" phase more often. Leaders dictated the vision, leaving little room for discussion or input. This approach, while efficient, often led to resistance and a lack of commitment. As I progressed, I encountered the "Selling" stage. Leaders presented the vision persuasively, emphasizing its benefits and addressing concerns. This approach was more engaging, ...

  Peter Senge, in his influential book "Schools That Learn," introduced the concept of the assembly line in education. This concept, borrowed from the industrial age, where assembly lines led to mass production, standardization and quality management. This suggests a sequential approach to learning, where one thing follows another, one process finishes before another starts. Linearity started making way in all aspects of our life, even education. While this model has been effective in certain respects, it can also limit our ability to think critically and holistically about life. The assembly line model in education is characterized by standardized curricula, a focus on grades and exams, and a linear progression through academic levels. While these elements can provide structure and efficiency, they can also stifle creativity and critical thinking. By emphasizing rote learning, focussing on grades and individual components, the assembly line model can overlook the interconnec...

  As I turn a year older, I find myself reflecting on my journey as a coach. What started as a role to facilitate growth and progress for others, has become a catalyst for my own growth. Through conversations with myself, I've come to realize that coaching is not just about helping others achieve their goals, but also about working on myself. As I progress in this role, I've learned that self-awareness is key. I've had to confront my own biases, limitations, and areas for improvement. It's been a humbling experience, but also a liberating one. With each conversation, I've gained new insights and perspectives, allowing me to become a better coach and person. My growth has been progressive, with each success and setback teaching me valuable lessons. I've set goals, achieved some, and adjusted others. Through it all, I've come to understand that coaching is not a destination, but a journey of continuous learning and self-improvement. As I look ahead, I'm ex...

  As a coach, I've encountered numerous individuals struggling with self-doubt and negative self-perception. Recently, a coachee asked a poignant question: "Do bad thoughts make me a bad person?" My response was simple yet profound: "The waves are not the ocean." At first, the coachee was taken aback, responding with a thoughtful "huh." This moment of realization was a turning point in our session. The metaphor struck a chord, allowing them to see their thoughts and emotions in a new light. Just as the ocean is vast and deep, encompassing both calm and turbulent waters, our minds are complex and multifaceted. The waves on the surface represent our thoughts and emotions, ever-changing and sometimes turbulent. However, they do not define the entirety of the ocean. Similarly, our thoughts and emotions do not define our true nature. This metaphor helped my coachee understand that their negative thoughts and emotions were mere waves, not a reflection of the...

  In the realm of coaching, the art of listening often trumps the skill of speaking. While a coach's questions can guide a client, it's the silent moments that truly unlock the potential for deep reflection and transformative insights. Imagine a coaching session with a high-performing executive struggling with work-life balance. They've been juggling demanding projects, a growing family, and a desire for personal fulfillment. As they describe their challenges, the executive's voice gradually slows down, their tone becoming more subdued. This is where silence becomes a potent tool. Instead of offering immediate advice or solutions, the coach chooses to simply listen. The silence that follows doesn't feel awkward; it's a space created for the client to delve deeper into their thoughts and emotions. As the silence stretches on, the executive begins to explore uncharted territories of their mind. They start to question their priorities, their values, and their defin...

 The World is Perfect, We Look at It Imperfectly Let's first learn about the Search for the Left-Handed Mug. There once was a left-handed man who lived in a right-handed world. Everything, from designs to molds, seemed to be made with the right-handed person in mind. His biggest problem was finding a mug. Every shop, mall, and store had mugs with handles on the right side. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t find a mug made for left-handed people. One day, he entered a shop. With little hope, he asked about a left-handed mug. The shopkeeper listened carefully and said, "Interesting, that's a special kind of mug. We have a special stock, but it's a bit expensive." The man's eyes lit up. He immediately agreed. The shopkeeper brought something from the back. The man was surprised. They were the same ordinary mugs, but with a slight difference. The handles were reversed. The handle that should have been on the right was now on the left. The man looked at the ...

  Account for What You Know, while celebrating progress and embracing growth" As I reflect on my journey, I've come to realize that it's not about who's ahead of me, but about how far I've come. It's easy to get caught up in comparing ourselves to others, but this mindset only leads to discouragement and neglects our own accomplishments. Instead, I've learned to focus on my progress, no matter how small it may seem. I'm proud of the achievements I've made, the skills I've developed, and the knowledge I've acquired. It's essential to acknowledge and celebrate our successes, rather than discounting them. However, I've also come to understand that there's grace in not knowing everything. It's okay to acknowledge the areas where I need growth and learning. I'm proud to be on a path of continuous learning, embracing new experiences, and expanding my knowledge. And it is also true that only if I do not know there will be a cont...

  In the training industry, it has become common for professionals to share their recent training successes on platforms like LinkedIn. So do I very often do. What is often highlighted is the ability to rally participants, engage them in various activities, share experiences, and foster vulnerability within the training room. As a trainer myself, I understand the substantial effort required to keep a group engaged and motivated throughout a session. However, this brings us to a critical question: Are we focusing on the efficiency of our training or its effectiveness, or ideally, both? Efficiency in Training Efficiency in training refers to the smooth execution of the training process. This includes organizing and conducting the session in a manner that maximizes participant engagement, seamlessly delivering content, and ensuring that all planned activities are completed within the allotted time. An efficient trainer can manage time well, maintain participant interest, and deliver c...

Embarking on the journey to become an NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) Master Practitioner has been an enlightening experience. One of the most profound realizations I've had during this process is the adage, "To teach others is to learn yourself better." This statement has proven to be incredibly true as I navigate through my master practitioner course. The opportunity to teach associate-level students about the NLP communication model has not only deepened my understanding but has also enhanced my ability to apply these concepts in real-life scenarios. Before diving into my teaching experiences, it's essential to briefly explain the NLP communication model. This model explores how individuals perceive and interpret the world around them, emphasizing the interplay between our sensory experiences (visual, auditory, kinesthetic) and our internal responses. By understanding this model, one can better communicate and influence others, leading to more effective coaching...

  Have you ever finished a good book and felt a surge of inspiration to see the world differently? That's exactly what happened to me after reading Steven Schuster's book "The Art of Thinking in Systems." It opened my eyes to the limitations of linear thinking (point A to point B) and the exciting possibilities of lateral thinking (out-of-the-box solutions). But what truly captured my imagination was the concept of Systems Thinking.  Although I have studied this concept of Systems Thinking as a part of my thesis, I was always looking at the macro picture of how system thinking can be applied to organisations and to running of teams and learning processes. In the rumination I did over these years on Systems Thinking, I hardly thought of how it can be applied to thinking day to day and putting on meaning to how are thoughts can be well structured. The organisation of thoughts as systems at play, can definitely change the way we view the world and the way are minds work....