Way to Success – Examine the Values You Hold

Let's Think of Values

Values are principles or beliefs, held by each of us. These are instilled in us, to the core, generally in early life, mostly the influence of family, social circle, and school. Although, the overall impact of the culture and society we live in dominates how we think and freeze our views, and make us take a stand on various topics; values guide our behavior, motives, ultimately influence our goal.

If your goals are aligned to your values, you stand a better chance to achieve them. First, understand your values and beliefs. What is it that you care for intensely and intently. Many things in your life will be dependent on your values, how you make a living, live your life. If goals are not aligned to your values then they will ultimately fizzle out after the initial rush. As your values do not sync, you will start losing interest in that goal. Trust yourself and your intuitions. Simplify the solutions that you set for yourself. The more complicated the solution, the more likely you are not to take that path and reach your goal.

According to Kenneth Acha, successful people have 7 values. They are ‘praise people and celebrate success’, ‘passion’, ‘relationships’, ‘accountability’, ‘innovation’, ‘servanthood’, and ‘excellence’. So values are primary, the bedrock of what our thoughts are based on, and that is followed by our purpose, which defines our success.

Values are also generational. For example, as generations passed from Baby Boomers to Generation X to Millennial to Generation Z, work values have changed. Earlier generations held ‘loyalty to their work’ as an essential value and spent their entire lives working with one business or firm, but it is not the same in today’s times.

What Will I Make of Today?

Values are like maps that direct you with the choice of goals that suit you as a person. If you want to be honest with yourself, then your goals must be determined by the values you hold. Values are the starting point, the benchmark, or reference so that you set goals that are synchronous to them. And recognize the asynchronous goals, that are not cut out for you.

So now the question is what are your core values? How do you determine them? Would it be possible to change them or amend them to function better or to set higher goals?

It could always be the case that we are aware of our values. On the other hand, most people have a vague understanding and are struggling to concretize their thoughts on the same. You can definitely consider attending a value clarification and goal setting training or seminar, or take professional help. 

You may even want to consider online tests available on many websites, some even for free. But before going for it, you would probably want to do a bit of homework on the personal front.

So to determine your values, get into the right mental state, and start with an empty mind. Ask yourself questions like ‘What do I really care about in my life? What do I believe in?’

Value of Relationships

Make a list of anything that comes to your mind. Usually, we think about family, job and career, relationships, social status, being productive, being of value to others, being loved, respected, etc. Ask yourself why do you feel these values are aspects of your life are important?

At this stage, you may also consider thinking and recalling meaningful experiences of life. For example, think about a time when you got an award for some task or project, or recall an incident when you were praised for being kind and generous towards a section of the society, or you were recognized for helping someone in need. What did you feel at that time? Did you feel high, elated, and more motivated to engage in that behavior again? What values do you link to a feeling like that? Ambition, being helpful, social consciousness? The more you use these questions, the more clarity you will get about the values you have. What gives you satisfaction? What qualities do you like in yourself and other people? 

On the other end, also question yourself on the incidents in life which have made you feel frustrated, bad, upset, unhappy. What did you feel that time, how did you get over that feeling?

Now, question yourself on the things you would not want to compromise in life, at any cost. Things you hold as extremely important for yourself, which fulfills you as an individual.

These questions will help unfold your inner feelings and the thoughts which accompany them, at the same time uncover values. But, for most people, the list will turn out to be really long.

Overlapping Values

The next step here would be to recognize the overlapping elements in your list and group the common values. For example, values like feeling respected, a need to be socially conscious, connecting with others, celebrating successes, would fall under the larger group of ‘Being a social person’. This will help you to focus on the values that you want to prioritize, the ones that give you pride, and matter to you. This exercise, that we just did is brainstorming. 

In the process of this exploration, I am sure we come across many realizations, which make us want to change or modify few values or maybe one of them. Definitely, one must give up the negative values. But those values which are positive contributors for us, we would want to amplify their effects for the better. You may consider changing your values when significant happenings occur in your life. For example, entering the world of work, starting a family, or leaving your full-time work for pursuing a business. 

Journey of Values

Think about those values which need modification or enhancement, and how it will back your current aspirations. For example, you have always been a social person, you love to be in groups, interaction is a practice you follow, you like to make friends and connect with people. So here, the value is ‘being a social person’. Now at this point, you are responsible to organize an event in your society or workplace, so your value can be modified to ‘collaboration’. That is, from ‘being a social person’ you upgrade to ‘collaboration’ for getting the event organized. Another example could be that you are ‘spend less on the things that are not required’, but since now, you need to give a secure life to your family, you need to change that to ‘fixing an amount for monthly saving’. Like these, you may revisit those values that will help you make a change for the better.

Values become the foundation for your decisions and goals. So take a step to clarify your values before freezing on your goals.